三打白骨精英语剧本

Three times beat monsters三打白骨精

第一幕 农夫家

农夫一家吃完饭在看电视

《新闻联播主题曲》，主持人开始播新闻。

主持人：Welcome to CCTV news , there are four monks from oriental Tang Dynasty to the west to get some books , let me tell you who they are.

师徒四人出场：

主持人：the man who rides a white horse may not be a prince ,he may be 唐僧. 唐 僧: hello ,I am唐 僧, have you seen a handsome monk（和尚） like me?Many people think I always talk too much，actually ,they are wrong. Let me tell you a secret, I haven’t ate meat for 3 months.

主持人:Not all monkeys are thin ,some monkeys may be fat.

悟空：Hi, this is monkey, my favorite thing is to beat monsters. Hey, monster ,where to go.

主持人：zhu bajie may not a ugly man ,he also can be very ugly （或者a beautiful girl）.

八 戒：Hello , beauties ,I am bajie ，I love all of beauties and I always feel hungry. 主持人:Not all people who carry luggages （担子） are farmers, he may be shaseng.

沙僧：Every audience(观众), I am shaseng, I am honest. I always speak little and do much, so, to choose a husband, I am your best choice.

电视机突然坏了

老太婆： Hey , what’s going on , honey you should check if there is something wrong with the TV

老头：nothing serious , it just ran out of signal.

村姑（女儿）：Dady and mommy, I really like tangseng, he is very handsome , I am a big fan of him .

老头：forget it , tangseng always talks too much, I can’t stand him, I prefer wukong . 老太婆：Oh no, wukong is too thin , I think shasheng is better, he is honest. 村姑：that’s it ,what about bajie?He is cute.

老太婆、老头：No way!

老太婆:he is too lazy .

老头：Too ugly 。

老太婆：Eats too much.

白骨精：Oh, honey，I am the most beautiful ,the most attractive and the most smart woman . My name is 白骨精, you can call me jingjing(精精).I know you are interested in the four monks(和尚). Now I will take you to see them, hahaha… 白骨精施法拴住了一家三口

第二幕

唐僧：阿弥陀佛,do you know where we are now?

悟空: Bajie,map!

八戒: (摸出，递给悟空)

悟空拿给唐僧看

悟空: Look, boss (凑近唐僧)………（唐僧、悟空一齐转向八戒）

唐僧: Bajie ! How Many times I have told you, don’t bring these pictures of beautiful girls with you.

八戒: Oh, boss ! Forgive me.(伸手拿回)

唐僧: (缩手)I’ll keep it for you until we reach the west .

八戒: But……

唐僧: Emitofo , nothing is lust , lust is nothing ! Map?

八戒: (递)Here.

沙僧：Em…… we have arrived in White Tiger Mountain!

八戒：Oh I can’t walk on any more!(坐) I am hungry now.

悟空: Fat Pig!

八戒: Monkey, if you dare to say these two words once again, I will ,

I will……….

悟空: You will what(凶相)?

八戒: I will help you catch fleas(跳蚤).

悟空: Oh, my ladygaga.

唐僧:（轻咳）Wukong, in fact ,I am a bit hungry could you go to get some food to me ?

八戒: You see ,boss is hungry, too !

唐僧: Baijie ! Don’t forget who ate my last meal!

沙僧: But boss , if a monster comes while brother monkey is away…..

唐僧: Em…….It is a problem . Wukong , do you have any idea?

悟空: No problem!(安装)（白骨精已躲在一旁偷看）

沙僧: What is this ?

悟空: Electric net !I have learnt the energy of electricity from master’s

books. So I made this. No monster can approach you if you stay in it!

唐僧: Em……Wukong, you are becoming more and more scientific!

阿弥陀佛, knowledge is power!

悟空: Don’t open the Electric net ,I will back soon , Bye!(走)

唐僧: Let’s play cards!(三人开始打牌)音乐《斗地主》

白骨精: Hm，!Hm ! Electric net , you are too childish . We will see! hahaha .(变成村姑)

村姑: (接近三人，望着)Can I join you? (八戒盯着村姑看）

八戒：Yes, of course, my lady. Come in please.(欲打开电网）

沙僧：Stop it. It is against monkey’s will. By the way, she is not your type. 八戒： Why？

沙僧：（看一眼村姑）She is way too beautiful for you.

唐僧: Shut up, you two. I’m sorry ,

We are playing Fighting Against Landlord and three people are enough.

村姑: (在一旁观看)Oh, chance, Bomb（ 炸）!

唐僧: Bomb . (打出)

村姑: Double King!

唐僧: Oh….I win ,lady , you are a master-hand , come in and teach me !(准备开电网门)

悟空: (回来，看见村姑)Oh,monster!(上前就打)

村姑: （躲在八戒后面）Help,help.

八戒: Don’t worry , I will protect you .

悟空一棒打死了村姑

唐僧: (气愤)Wukong! Look what you have done! She is my teacher!

悟空: Boss, you are stupid , She is a monster!

唐僧: You mean I am stupid? Ok I will sing a song for you ! Only you…(音乐only you)

悟空: Oh, please don’t……I am stupid .

唐僧: 嗦噶，I will let you know , your boss is always right.

白骨精: (真身出现)Sunwukong, you are a foolish monkey, I’ll teach you a lesson!(变成太婆)

老太婆: Hello , have you seen my daughter?

唐僧: Daughter? Boy or girl?(连忙挡住地尸体)No ,sorry I haven’t see your daughter .(陪笑，老太婆想看后面是什么，唐僧挡)

悟空: （咬牙切齿）You monster, I’ll beat you into hell!( 悟空追打老太婆, 老太婆躲至唐僧身后，悟空打，不想打到唐僧头，唐僧晕，悟空再打死老太婆) 沙僧：Oh , my god , monkey you have beat our boss , how dare you !

八戒&沙僧: Are you Ok , boss?(扶唐僧)

沙僧: Look ,(伸2指) how many?

唐僧: Five…..(晕乎乎地)

八戒：Oh, boss , you are fine , thanks god .啊门。

（八戒、沙僧做基督教手势）

唐僧：Yeah , I am fine ! stupid monkey , once again , I’ll send you to west . (更凄惨的only you)

悟空：I can’t stand it ,please help me , I will die.

沙僧： Monkey knows he was wrong , please stop.

白骨精：sunwukong , tangseng is mine , I will come back soon , hahaha.

(说完变成老头)

老头: Have you see my wife and daughter , they come out but not back until now , I worried about them .

唐僧:I have never seen them

悟空: monster!(打)

（老头躲在沙僧后面）

沙僧：Brother monkey , never do it again , if you did , boss will be very angry, the result will be serious .(师傅很生气，后果很严重)

八戒：please don’t（拉着悟空）

（悟空拉开两人打死了老头）

唐僧: （想阻止，未及）You,you.....(险些晕，沙僧, 八戒 扶住)You have killed three lives!

悟空: No ,they are not human beings ! They are created by monster!

唐僧: Monster ? You are a real monster! Never let me see you , go away!

悟空: (悲，离去)（音乐《人鬼情未了》）

八戒: Boss, brother Monkey has left …

唐僧: Shut up , don't mention that guy any more! (自己擦眼泪)

白骨精: (出现) Ha,ha,ha!(三尸体在白骨精招手后“飘”走)

唐僧: （惊）who are You......

白骨精: How foolish you are ,Mr Tang! (抓住唐僧) I'll enjoy your meat and drink your blood ,ha , ha...... (八戒、沙僧去阻斗，被击退)

悟空: (悄悄走到白骨精后，打晕白骨精，倒在唐僧怀里)

唐僧: Wukong?

八戒: Oh , Brother Monkey!

沙僧: Our hero is back!

唐僧: I,I can't understand......What happened?

悟空: Boss your IQ really needs increasing! They are all monsters.

唐僧: How , how did you find out?

悟空: (沉默).......Monkey's intuition(直觉)

唐僧: Wukong(悟空不理T)I misunderstood you.(悟空仍不理)I'm sorry(小声) 悟空: What?

唐僧: I'm sorry.

悟空: Em? Louder,please?

唐僧: I......am......sorry.....

（悟空满意）：Come on guys. Pick up our stuff. Let’s go! (音乐：敢问路在何方） 定格画面，主持人上场。

主持人：Life is never easy, so is their journey. There are more risks and adventures waiting for them. Let’s wish them all the best. That’s all for today. See you tomorrow.